Zeep!

• Age: Year and a half
• Gender: Female
• Occupation: Full-time, live-in companion for neurotic twenty-something
• Interests: Shredding, chewing, eating, hanging upside down, nuzzling, cuddling, nose-nibbling, hissing at strangers, preening myself and my mom, being scratched and sniffed
• Likes: The sound of my own voice, the doorbell, Dr. Seuss (I was named after a character in the classic, One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish), cheerios, green foods, shoulders and heads, dangly earrings, and pooping every 8 to 10 minutes.
• Dislikes: Other birds, all people besides my mom, the dark, my mom's poker parties, showers, the doctor, molting, being alone, being called "Pigeon," when people cough or sneeze, and pedicures.
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• Answers to Frequently Asked Questions:
  1. Yes, that is the only noise I make.
  2. No, I am not friendly.
  3. No, I will not fly to your shoulder or do any other tricks.
  4. Yes, you can admire my beauty, but no, you cannot touch me.
  5. Yes, I have inherited some of my mom's neuroses.